Housewife Tip #4

Be Honest & Make Incentives

I live with a boy. He's not quite a man since I have done his laundry more than he has done it for himself since we've started living together. We share a room and a house. He hates doing laundry and washing dishes.

I cannot stand cleaning up other people's messes. This causes some strife.

I tried the being honest method first... in not the best way possible.

I came home very aggravated about being a full-time student, working an evening job, being a dedicated sister in my sorority, and having to come home to a sink full of dishes - 

Basically, my honesty was in a scream... "Why do I have to come home, after everything else I do, to clean up after YOU?! What do YOU do all day? You don't have full-time school hours, you have no job, and you don't do any extracurricular activities. All you do is sit at the computer!!!!"

Obviously this didn't work to make anything better.

Part one of Housewife Tip #4 : honesty is good when you are calm and speaking rationally

I tried the incentive method second.

I was annoyed that he left out a certain pan - he always leaves the pan on the oven after using it. I bet him a CookOut milkshake that the pan would NOT be cleaned by the time I got home 3 hours later. Low and behold, the pan was cleaned! Is cleaning one pan worth a $4 milkshake? Not really. But it was a good way to say, "I really appreciate and need your help on this."

If my man was around when I started doing chores, I would ask if he could help me. He usually would say, "Sure." kind of begrudgingly, but would help anyways. I would try to make sure we had a fun or daily re-cap conversation while we emptied the dishwasher. Once we were done, I'd point out that it took half the time for us to do it together, we had a conversation about the project he just finished, and that I really appreciated his help (cue big kiss and hug). 

This has helped. 

And not to be too graphic, but if you make some other kind of.... intimate incentives... it is VERY successful

Recap:

Be honest - Only be honest in a constructive way; if you want to calmly explain that you are very busy and would greatly appreciate some help with chores, and maybe come up with a delegation game plan, that is constructive.

Make incentives - If your roommate goes out of their way to do something for you, thank them in that moment if you think of it, or even thank them later with a note or candy bar present. If you ask for someone to help you with a chore, it makes it so that neither of you has to do it by yourself, and you both get to chat and get something productive accomplished all at once. But really- saying THANK YOU! really does make a difference. That positive reinforcement idea really works. Try it :)

Curtis OUT.